Super Smash Shenanigans
by Kubu
Summary: *CANCELLED*


Six thumbnails covered the viewing window as it faded to black. Youtube's recommended videos. Marth had seen every single one of them, along with pretty much all the videos in his long playlist.

It was no mean feat, requiring hours of his attention; hours that he was happy to sacrifice because the videos were that awesome. Impeccable voice acting, hilarious and nerve-wracking writing, beautiful character and scenery design… this show had it all.

As the prince closed the internet browser, a smile stretched across his face as he imagined the overjoyed look on Lucas' face when he heard of his approval of the show he had sat through. Now where was the child that had brought unto him such a heavenly experience?

* * *

Why, he was currently trying to eat his lunch in peace. But Wario and Sonic wouldn't leave him alone. Nothing out of the ordinary, then. Creasing his brow as he brought another forkful of spaghetti to his mouth, he attempted to filter out the pestering of the fastest thing alive and the fattest one.

"You're not-a man enough to eat all-a dat spaghetti yourself, little boy!"

"At least eat it faster! Peach could eat faster than you, for crying out loud!"

The filter in his ears wasn't working very well today, it seemed. Lucas heard every word the two pests uttered. That's not to say he was affected by them. It was probably the eightieth time they had used those insults. In a month.

The child kept on eating, hearing the jeering but not actually listening to them. That's when he heard hurried footsteps growing larger. He gulped, partly to swallow his food and partly because it sounded like that person was coming for him.

And he was. Marth tackled Lucas off of his seat and hugged him with all of his might and good will. "Thank you so much," he laughed.

"Aw, Lucas," Sonic cooed mockingly, "you have an admirer!" Wario provided the pointing laughter.

Forcing off the clingy prince and getting up onto his feet, he glared at his assailant with contempt. "Why would you do something like that in the presence of these guys?"

"I'm sorry, but I just had to tell you right away—"

"Marth, it can wait." The psychic looked toward the less happier smashers, who were gazing holes into him and his clingy friend. "These guys are just waiting for something to tear us to shreds with!"

"But you've enlightened me! You've shown me nirvana; how could I not thank you every chance I got?"

"You can thank me by not thanking me right now!" Lucas whispered pointingly.

"What are you going on about?" Sonic asked.

Marth stared the hedgehog right in his face, grinning madly. "I'm talking about the greatest television show ever!"

Lucas' eyes went wide with fear. His gestures of panic and hurriedness would have told the prince to stop talking, if he wasn't focused on spreading the joy around.

"Well? Out with it," Wario demanded, tapping his foot impatiently.

"Marth… please don't tell them…" Lucas' plea was in vain.

"I am talking about…"

* * *

"Who's scheduled to fight in the next match-up, Zelda?"

In the courtyard of the spectacular mansion, Samus and the princess were seated at a garden table. A wintery breeze wafted past them, carrying a minty scent. The cold was less than noticeable.

Zelda was looking at a pamphlet marked with the recognizable Smash Brothers logo. "If I'm right about the time, then in about an hour there's going to be a Brawl between Sonic and—"

"NO!" A loud cry from within the mansion's walls nearly knocked the girls off of their seats.

"… and Lucas, speak of the devil."

"He seems upset about something."

"How on earth did you know?" Zelda groaned.

"I'm going to go see what's wrong. Are you coming with me?"

* * *

"Are you kidding me?" Sonic said. "You watch…" He couldn't even namecheck the program before collapsing into laughter.

"What are you implying, rat?" Marth scowled, smile flipping upside down and eyes narrowing threateningly.

"You're a sissy," Wario said, filling in for his laughter-incapacitated friend. "You and Lucas."

The child had his head buried in his hands, and was silently sobbing to himself. "Why did you have to tell them, Marth? We're a laughing stock now!"

Marth simply glared at the Sonic and Wario as they continued to disrespect his passion. "We shouldn't be," he snarled underneath his breath.

"Besides," the fat sceptic scoffed, "there's no way a show like that could be any good."

"HOW DARE YOU!" Marth leapt over the table and held his sword against the throats of the unbeliever and his terrified accomplice, forcing them down and letting blade touch flesh. "How dare you even consider the possibility that it could be anything less than the greatest achievement in the history of the universe?"

"Uh… Marth?"

Samus and Zelda walked in on Marth pinning two seemingly innocent smashers to the ground with his blade for no apparent reason. Wanting to find out this reason, Zelda continued: "Why are you doing that?"

"They don't like it, but it's awesome! They must be lying!"

"Oh, Marth…" Samus groaned. "Can't you respect other people's opinions?"

"But I can't… I can't possibly believe it!"

"I'm not asking you to believe them; I'm asking you to take away your sword so you don't cut their throats!"

Marth just gripped his weapon tighter, refusing to give in. "Let them bleed. The world's better off without naysayers!"

"OKAY! OKAY!" Wario cried. "We admit it! We've never seen it! We withdraw our comments! Please don't kill us."

Shooting his hostages one last glance of disapproval, the blue-haired prince sheathed his sword. "Meet me at the computer lab. We have awesomeness to watch," he demanded without a hint of happiness.

"I'm coming!" Lucas followed him out of the dining room. The eyes of smashers that were once staring at the loud and happy one focused back on lunch when he left.

Wario and Sonic scratched the back of their necks with humility, the latter more so than the former. "Thanks… uh…" the hedgehog stuttered. "…for getting him off of our back, Samus. Heh." He smiled to her. She did not smile back.

"We're not done here," Zelda snapped, frowning like a disapproving mother. "You're going to stop complaining about shows you don't know anything about."

"What do you mean?" Wario asked cautiously, a cautious frown on his open mouth.

"We mean," Samus smirked, "that you're going to meet with Marth and watch that show with him."

"What? No way!" Sonic thrust his arms forward in protest. "I refuse to do anything that prissy guy likes. There's no way it'd be cool enough for me."

The bounty hunter stared at Sonic as an argument formed in her head. _So that's his angle?_ "Really, Sonic? I've seen this show. It's not all that bad. You can stomach one episode at least."

"Even if I believed your lie," Wario said, "the only reason you'd like that show is because—"

"Because," Sonic nervously interrupted, "your taste in television is impeccable. Now, I do believe Marth is waiting for me, so I'll just—"

"Not without us," Zelda said, tripping up the fastest thing alive before he could run off to who knows where. She reached down and picked up the blue creature by the leg. "You coming too, Wario?"

"Why the hell not," he sighed. "Maybe I'll get some entertainment out of the look on Marth's pretty-boy face when I prove myself right."

* * *

"No, no, no! How did something like this happen?"

"It's no big deal, really."

Marth was close to pulling his blue hair out when the other four smashers arrived. "But there's an extra two minutes on this video's runtime! It lasted twenty-two minutes when I watched it last, but now it's got a runtime of twenty-four!"

"You memorised the runtime?" Sonic droned, still dangling by a foot from Zelda's hand and failing to look cool. "Is the episode so boring you had nothing better to do?" Then he was dropped.

"That's not really all that big a deal, Marth," Lucas said. "There could be differences in runtimes of that size between episodes. The uploader might have forgotten to cut out an ad break or two."

"It's the same episode, the same uploader! I don't understand!"

"Calm down, Marth," Zelda said. "Let's just take a look at that extra two minutes and see what's wrong."

"You know, statistically the extra two minutes are more likely to be—"

"That's a good idea, Zelda!" the prince cheered, ignoring the child and playing the video where it left off. And indeed, something was wrong about the ending. It was playing out a little bit differently.

"Okay, nothing suspect here," Samus droned. "Maybe we should check the begin—"

"Wait… the screen's starting to get brighter… and I think they can see—"

Suddenly, the smashers were engulfed in light. All they could see was white, which slowly changed to black.

When Marth was able to see again, his eyes felt heavy, his vision was blurry and his moaning definitely wasn't in his voice… what had happened?

* * *

**No prizes for guessing the identity of the video.**


End file.
